An introduction to the Path of Tantra

I so often get asked: "What is Tantra really about - is it all about great sex...?", and told how confusing it is looking for answers on the net. There are many paths of Tantra, many ways of teaching, and yes, it can be extremely confusing trying to bring it all down to some kind of understandable common denominator. With this journal entry, I'd like to make an attempt at clarifying some aspects of what Tantra is.
For those wanting to delve more practically into what Tantra is and what it offers, this month's Tantric Fire Couple's Retreats being held in Stanford and the Northern Drakensberg, and the Come Together Single's Retreat in the Northern Drakensberg, are excellent ways to start!

Warm greetings to you all
Leandra

An introduction to the Path of Tantra
Tantric literature on the market today, is often in the form of "how to" sex manuals, promising bigger and better orgasms and more sexual satisfaction. Tantra is however much more than a “school of sex”! It could however be called a “school of love” as it is a teaching of non-judgmental, absolute unconditional love. What it is, is a spiritual path teaching meditation in the most physical moments of human experience, positively encompassing and influencing all aspects of life, particularly relationships of all kinds.

Although we are living in the age of sexual liberation, it is rare to find people enjoying a fulfilling sexuality. The sexual revolution of the sixties in fact, has led to marketing life's most intimate moments, resulting in floods of images that appear to have liberated us from conventional norms but in fact, have simply created a new cliché.

Over and above this, many adults are burdened with sexually repressive conditioning from childhood, education, religion, and in South Africa, we know too well that even politics and governments can play a huge role in how we think and feel and with whom we engage with sexually. We have been led to believe that spirituality and sexuality are divided and we struggle to find meaning in our sexuality.

In addition, the pressures of busy and stressful modern life - of finding that “soul mate” and then the challenge of long lasting relationships and marriage, as well as bringing up children within full working lives - presents an enormous strain on individuals and couples. The principles of our performance-oriented society have forced their way into the bedroom resulting in more and more men and women experiencing sexual difficulties. Intimacy is often reduced to having sex as a kind of sleeping pill at night, resulting in a “quick” release of tension and a general feeling of emptiness. Equally dissatisfying for many individuals is one or other form of living promiscuously, one partner after the other, experiencing intimacy that is not uplifting and lacking in real joy, resulting in lives that are often accompanied by loneliness and a lack of fulfillment.

For many, the only way to combat this is by delving further into a materialistically orientated way or life, thrill seeking activities, substance dependencies and often some form of depression. Yet we long for vitality in our relationships and for a form of spirituality that affirms the unity of body and soul.

Despite the fact that it is thousands of years old, Tantra presents us with a possibility to transcend such difficulties arising from this very modern situation. Tantra cultivates, deepens and spiritualises human nature without presenting it as imperfect or repressing it. Rather than concentrating on physical pleasure alone, Tantra details the mental states to be achieved during sexual activity enabling us to bridge the gap of sexuality and spirituality.

An ever-expanding system that has matured through the ages, Tantra trains the body to improve its capacity for the flow of life energy, giving the mind a higher ability to concentrate, and the soul ease and lightness.

In contrast to traditional psychotherapy, esoteric and other healing modes, Tantra uses the body and its physical expression to work on blockages in the subconscious, embracing the sexual emotionally, physically and spiritually and thus doing, satisfying and amplifying the human soul. Most of us, have forgotten how to contact and live from a place of being whole and perfect already. Tantra shows us the way back home. Sometimes called a path to Enlightenment, to Bliss, Nirvana, Ecstasy, which occurs through the marriage of energy and consciousness, Tantra teaches you how.

From a tantric perspective, each human being is understood as a reflection of the entire cosmos. By entering inside one's own subjective being with a witnessing consciousness, all aspects of the body, mind and emotions are revealed in their refined potential. With the whole person being accepted as divine, each aspect of being human can become a door to expanded consciousness.
What is Tantra?

Tantra is an art, a method and a science, an outlook and a way of life that teaches us how to open our hearts, how to embrace our emotionality and sexuality, enabling us to celebrate the whole of life while recognising the Divine essence within all beings. Tantra is in effect an experiential path of transformation.

Originating in what is now modern India, Tantra is at least 5000-7000 or more years old, pre-dating and influencing both Hinduism and Buddhism. All world religions have subsequently had some form of tantric past, subsequently destroyed by main-stream fundamentalists. The result is that many religions believe you can have either physical pleasure or spiritual growth, but not both. Tantra disagrees entirely. Physical and sensual pleasure is understood as the key to our spiritual growth; without one, you can’t have the other.

The word Tantra is composed of the Sanskrit words for weaving and expansion. By weaving together, accepting and entering deeply into every aspect of our lives, including sexuality, our hearts and minds are able to expand into blissful oneness.

Another word for Tantra is Sacred Sexuality or Spiritual Sexuality. Everyone has their own definition of what is "spiritual" and "sacred" are, but most of us agree it refers to something wonderful, loving, joyous, and transcendent – something beyond us. And yet in Tantra we find that it is within us as well. Central to Tantra is the understanding that sexual energy is our life force, and that the universe and humans as individuals are all filled with the same energy. Sexual energy is reclaimed as sacred, healing the split between body and spirit. Therefore any repression of this energy leaves us unbalanced and damaged. Trauma, (e.g. grief and pain, embarrassment, physical or emotional abuse etc.) is stored in our body as a body memory. The effect of these memories are blockages – repression and limitations - which continue throughout our lives, reducing our emotional and physical well-being, inhibiting our flow of energy and limiting our expression of life and sexuality in one or another way.

Tantra rejects the repressive, moralistic, and self-denying code of living propounded by many religions and cultures, resulting in our emotional, sensual and our body’s sexual needs are met with guilt, repression, denial and punishment. When attention is paid to bodily needs, it’s usually aimed at avoidance, for example of disease or pregnancy. Little attention is paid to the development and expansion of our body’s sensuality and there is no other teaching that shows us how to embrace and value this as does the Path of Tantra. Tantra teaches how to embrace and value your sensual self, the whole of your body including your sexuality and in so doing experience something of who we really are and our relationship to the Divine.

In order to become whole, to grow and blossom as adults, these blockages and repressions need clearing from both our physical and psychic systems. One thing that most religions agree on is the fact that we are more than our physical body. The understanding in Tantra is that, there is actually no separation between our physical body and that which is more than the body. In fact, there is no separation between us and others, between us and the world around us, between us and all of existence. Tantra is a non-dualist understanding of the world. Each and every one of us, in essence, is already divine, whole, and perfect.

In its very essence Tantra is a yoga - the yoga of presence i.e. becoming aware or conscious of what is going on in your body, emotions, and thoughts, learning to accept whatever is arising in the moment without judgment. Sexual energy and our personal expression of sexuality are included in the tantric concept of the body and of life in general. Tantra can therefore be seen as a reconciliation of sexuality and spirituality.

Although tantric strands have emerged within various religions, Tantra itself is not a religion and requires no prior belief system. It is essentially an experiential path leading to gnosis (knowing through experience) or inner wisdom. We learn to go beyond the limitations of the ego, ultimately touching the limitlessness of the Universe and within that, our wholeness. In fact, with Tantra, each sensorial experience offers a door to cosmic consciousness.

How does Tantra do this?

The sensual component of tantric rituals is characterized by creative uses of dance, music, colours, flowers, aroma, food, and particularly our sense of touch. It is systematic, serious and thorough, but also playful, fun and wild, reclaiming the body, mind, and sprit to own as ones own. This leads to inner freedom - freedom to celebrate your body, your sexuality, your soul desires: freedom from fear, from guilt and shame; freedom to breathe and feel deeply; freedom to be fully present in the NOW.

A student of Tantra will at some stage, experience what is called a tantric awakening. This means gaining mastery of the emotions. All negative emotion, when projected toward others, is like a spinning wheel or magnet. It does nothing to address the source of the issue, and hurts ourselves even more than the other.

Two things are essential to, and at the same time the result of a tantric awakening:

1.) Conscious choice or taking responsibility for all our emotions and choices.

Blame and victimization lead to feelings of separateness and neediness. Subconsciously however, we know that we must be more than this. We really do want to create our own destinies and to take rightful ownership of our full power.

2.) Discarding internal agendas that do not serve our highest good.

This means the courage to know ourselves on a deep level, to know what we really want and then how to act on that desire. In other words, surrendering to the soul's desire and knowing that we are pure divinity. We are not the sum of our negative emotions, personal lies and the petty games we play. We are so much more than our judging, self-condemning mind would lead us to believe. We are talented, beautiful, and unique children of God.

The nature of Tantra is experiential. It is not something one can learn from a lecture or a book or by watching a DVD. These can only give ideas and hints. Tantra needs to be, has to be experienced. Whether you are single or in a relationship, you need to practice what you read and see. Your learning is essentially from your experiences. Each personal development in Tantra - physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually - is totally unique. You can begin the Tantric path from wherever you are right now. If you have anger or hurt, you can discover the tremendous potential for spiritual awakening contained within that energy. If you are feeling sexual, this quality becomes a key to open all the secrets of human energy. All you need is a willingness to explore your inner world and be prepared to let go of conditioning and open your heart and soul to joy and bliss.

The best way of experiencing Tantra is with a dedicated and genuine teacher. In ancient times, Tantra being a secret path, teachers were hard to come by and difficult to find. Here in South Africa there are very few trained practitioners. However, there are opportunities in the form of individual sessions as well as weekend retreats. The National Institute of Tantra South Africa sets ethical standards for the work and will in the next few years compile a list of qualified practitioners as they emerge from training.

If you feel ready to begin right now, here are some exercises to begin your journey:

Exercises

1.) Using the senses to come into the body and the Now
Close or blindfold your eyes and focus the other senses (hearing, taste, smell) intensely for 15 – 30 minutes. Focus entirely on the experience.

2.) Using nature to experience our sense of touch

Find a pleasant place out of doors and close or blindfold your eyes. First use sound to draw you into the body – leaves rustling in the wind, waves thrashing onto the beach, birds etc. Then slowly focus on your open skin (arms, legs, face) and feel the air touching your skin, feel the breeze caressing you. Stay in this meditation as long as you are able.

3.) Tantric Breathing

Purse your lips as if you are going to whistle or drink through a straw. Breathe in and out through pursed lips, sucking the air in and gently blowing the air out. Pause on both the full breath and the empty breath and become aware of the changes in your body. Be aware of the 4 stages of breathing – the inward breath, the full breath, the outward breath and the empty breath state of the body. Do this at least 3 minutes every day. Repeat as often as you like.

4,) Tantric Touch with a partner and alone.

With a partner: choose who will be passive and who will be active and change roles later. Begin with tantric breathing to get into the body and the Now and continue this breathing throughout the exercise. Take at least 30 minutes to slowly touch and stroke your partner’s body. Be fully in your hands, experience his/her body as if you are touching it for the first time. Touch to please yourself, not to please your partner. You will find, this ensures that you in fact do please him/her when you touch in such a way that it is pleasing to yourself.

On your own: touch and stroke your body as if it were a lover’s body or as if you are touching your body for the first time. Discover and explore and touch in a way pleasing to yourself. Allow sensual sensations to arise without judgment.